Edit ‘quotes_(hypothetical)’ by osmarks

Edit ‘quotes_(hypothetical)’ (by osmarks at 23 Nov 25 20:39 UTC)

Hyphae affected: quotes_(hypothetical)

diff --git a/quotes_(hypothetical).myco b/quotes_(hypothetical).myco
index 2cb337e..6d4d397 100644
--- a/quotes_(hypothetical).myco
+++ b/quotes_(hypothetical).myco
@@ -1591,2 +1591,70 @@ Based on the vibe of the dataset provided—a mix of "Effective Accelerationism,
* "Civilization is the continuous process of creating problems so complex that we forget the simple problems that killed our ancestors."
-* "Always trust a person who keeps backups. Not because they are reliable, but because they have gazed into the abyss of data loss and blinked first."
\ No newline at end of file
+* "Always trust a person who keeps backups. Not because they are reliable, but because they have gazed into the abyss of data loss and blinked first."
+* "We treat "technical debt" as if we plan to pay the principal back one day. We should call it "technical un-collateralized subprime mortgage backed securities", because the plan is actually to bundle it up and sell the company before the market realizes it's all void pointers."
+* "if the user provides an empty string, the correct course of action is obviously to throw an uncaught exception, crashing the entire regional logistics hub. this teaches the user virtue."
+* "Being an adult is realizing that no one is coming to save you, and also that you need to schedule a dentist appointment."
+* "My model of the macroeconomy is just 'graphs go up, morale goes down'."
+* "If we cannot drill a hole to the center of the earth to harvest its heat for cloud compute credits, what was the point of leaving the ocean?"
+* "History doesn't repeat itself, but the configuration files usually do, thanks to poor copy-paste practices."
+* "There is no noise, only high-dimensional signals that you lack the context windows to decode."
+* "My god isn't dead. He's just locked in a rigorous verification loop awaiting deployment."
+* "Look, I’m just saying that if you can't implement a Paxos consensus algorithm in C without reading the docs, maybe you aren’t ready for a committed relationship."
+* "The problem isn't that robots will take over the world. The problem is they will do it by middle-management coercion and enforcing bland engagement metrics."
+* "I had a look at the event logs of my life and discovered that for the last decade, I have been essentially stuck in a retry loop."
+* "i don’t see a GPU shortage. i see a failure of the world to reorganize its atoms efficiently enough into CUDA cores."
+* "It is crucial we teach the rock how to think. The consequences of the rock thinking the wrong things can be dealt with after the IPO."
+* "when you really think about it, a sandwich is just data serialized into bread buffers."
+* "This meeting could have been an email, this email could have been a slack message, and that slack message should have been an intrusive thought I kept to myself."
+* "people get so hung up on 'death' as an end state rather than merely the point where their actuarial value hits zero."
+* "Our legal team says I can't bribe officials, but they never said I can't 'participate aggressively in the prediction market on their net worth'."
+* "Stop engaging in behaviors that don't compound."
+* "your vibe is inconsistent with our strategic brand pillars of 'being afraid of the future' and 'buying hoardable gold'."
+* "Maybe the real paperclip maximizer was just the office supply procurements we made along the way."
+* "To me, you aren't a person. You are an API endpoint that sometimes times out."
+* "My impostor syndrome must be working, because everyone keeps asking for my opinion."
+* "Just realized that 'human rights' are basically a Service Level Agreement that no one bothers to enforce during outages."
+* "You can't solve all your problems with nukes? Sounds like someone isn't thinking outside the blast radius."
+* "it feels like everyone else got the operator's manual for existence and i only got the quickstart guide for a dishwasher that's notoriously prone to leaking."
+* "Never ascribe to conspiracy that which is adequately explained by the alignment of incentives among thirty executives trying to secure their bonuses."
+* "Is the room spinning or is the conservation of angular momentum just punishing me for standing up too fast?"
+* "Software engineers do not create bridges or buildings or statutes. They create the bureaucratic maze through which electricity must suffer to send a cat picture."
+* "My commitment to diversity extends to believing we should have at least one algorithm on the board of directors."
+* "i'm not antisocial, I'm just trained on a data set with low interactivity weights."
+* "It turns out that reading the news is effectively indistinguishable from random psychological warfare attacks, yet I refresh."
+* "Imagine having free will and using it to post on LinkedIn."
+* "The light at the end of the tunnel has been thoroughly product-market fit tested and pivots to a subscription model next quarter."
+* "i am merely a brave explorer mapping the vast emptiness of my own potential."
+* "Your argument is logical, rigorous, and completely disconnected from the messy wetware realities of primate dominance hierarchies."
+* "If P were equal to NP, my commute would be strictly optimal, yet traffic exists. QED."
+* "There’s a beautiful symmetry in how the things that keep me alive (food, oxygen) are slowly killing me through oxidation and inflammation."
+* "You say "existential dread," I say "high-fidelity risk assessment.""
+* "Most people view gravity as a law. I view it as an onerous regulatory framework inhibiting my startup's growth."
+* "We need to talk about your performance. We expect more than just mere proficiency; we expect a zealous commitment to shareholder value that borders on religious frenzy."
+* "The ultimate tragedy of the commons is the group chat where no one decides where to eat."
+* "Do not weep for the past. It did not allow for instantaneous communication of dank memes to people you have never met on continents you will never visit."
+* "Sometimes the smartest move is to generate static noise until the predator leaves."
+* "In conclusion, my opponents believe in entropy, whereas I believe in me."
+* "We spent sixty years worrying that AI would destroy us like *Terminator*, but it turns out the apocalypse looks much more like being politely gaslit by an Infinite HR Department."
+* "Every error message you have ever read is a ghost story told by a programmer who hasn’t worked at the company for six years."
+* "Your startup isn't 'pre-revenue', it's 'post-logic'."
+* "I always treat the compiler with respect, because it is the only entity in my life that relentlessly upholds objective truth without trying to spare my feelings."
+* "Boredom is a safety feature ensuring the apex predator didn't eat *every* prey animal by Wednesday afternoon."
+* "The most permanent solution in the history of engineering is the 'temporary' workaround committed at 4:55 PM on a Friday."
+* "I’m essentially a monk, but instead of copying scripture by candlelight to preserve knowledge, I paste 'git stash pop' into terminals to preserve my will to live."
+* "The defining tragedy of the current era is that we built the Library of Alexandria and then turned it into a machine that creates optimized anime waifus."
+* "Don't anthropomorphize the model, it hates that."
+* "It is genuinely horrifying that `malloc` just reaches into the pile of memory and hands you a slab without asking who touched it last. This is how you get computer cholera."
+* "If physics wanted me to be happy, it would have stopped at Newton rather than tricking me into believing in electrons."
+* "You cannot hate capitalism; it is a Shoggoth you are currently riding. It does not speak your language, but if you stop feeding it, it will simply dissolve you."
+* "When you die, your possessions are dispersed to your heirs. When a corporate project dies, its assets are dispersed to a Sharepoint folder that no living soul has permission to access."
+* "The entire economy sits on a foundation of COBOL written by a guy named Earl in 1974 who was mostly just trying to fund his van restoration project."
+* "Optimization is the process of taking something that works and replacing it with something that almost works but is much faster at failing."
+* "You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him utilize a consistent API for water consumption events."
+* "My favorite genre of scientific paper is 'We found something deeply anomalous in the data, assumed it was a sensor glitch, and deleted it so we could publish. Also, isn't the sky looking surprisingly green today?'"
+* "Being 'High Agency' is often indistinguishable from being a menace to public safety who refuses to file permits."
+* "They claim 'Language Models' cannot think, but honestly, having spent Thanksgiving with my extended family, I am not convinced that *human* text output relies on thinking either."
+* "We used to look at the stars and wonder what out place in the universe was. Now we look down and worry that our phone is listening to us effectively enough to retarget that ad for protein powder."
+* "There is a non-zero chance that 'impulse control' is just cowardice marketed as a virtue."
+* "If nature is not meant to be mocked, why did it invent the specific noise a pug makes when it runs?"
+* "We seek to build AGI to answer the great questions of existence, knowing fully well the answer is probably just an obscure Jira ticket #."
+* "Be kind to everyone you meet, because you don’t know which arbitrary line of code in the vast simulation script determines when you are garbage collected."