G™Heav

Heav is a person who exists. They are part of the Apiaristics Consortium and are known to make various good things, like heavdrones. They're speculated to be related to HTech™ somehow, but no link has been definitively confirmed.

Heav is known to be better than gollark in all ways, axiomatically. This is due to gollark being utterly wrong in every way, all of the time (unlike heav, who would never).